sooo confused

OK I dont know what is wrong with me, but i feel so confused right now. Part of me Is really down, and i dont know the exact reason why. I have so much going through my head right now, its crazy!. I want to go home for a little and clear my head and all, and ive even considered, going to school back at home and seeing how i feel and try to gather my thoughts and all. I talked to mike about it and he just says that he doesnt want to hold me back. I feel like im hurting him and i dont want too, but i cant figure out what is the best thing to do right now..... im so confused. I knew this life was not going to be easy, I already had that in mind. So why am I feeling this way??

weird...

Ok for the past few days I have been feeling really weird. Ive been having weird ass dreams, and I feel like I'm sad most of the time..I know it sounds like im depressed but im not. Maybe its just the job getting to me, and maybe im just really tired. But I just feel different and I cant explain it. Maybe its just cause im a female, and we get that way sometimes. lol I dont know..
So some friends of mine i made down here are going home for awhile. One girl is going home to be with family cause her husband is deployed, and she miscarried a baby. So she is going to be with family for like a month. Another girl is going for like two months, to just be with family while her husband is deployed. Im happy that mike didnt deploy and all...but i kinda wish i was going home for a little while. I know my family misses me, and i do too...and my birthday is coming up. But iIhave a feeling tickets would be too expensive to go right now, and we just went back for christmas. So it doesnt look like that will happen this time. I am going to keep an eye on prices though and see what deals they have to offer . well im out for now. Dianna